Childbirth Ed Class

I was trying to find the right class for us to attend because I didn't want to spend a lot of money, and I wanted it to be worth-while. I knew that the hospital where I will be delivering the baby was offering classes, but I also heard they were dry and boring. So, I branched out and did a little investigating on what else was out there that would be more fulfilling.

I found a class that was being offered at a Yoga (prenatal and postnatal) studio called Blooma. I had heard wonderful things about this place, that the yoga and instructors were great, so I looked into it. The owner is a doula so she offers a lot of educational workshops in a addition to her pre and post-natal yoga classes. There was one course that struck my eye and knew that it was going to be perfect for me and my husband. It was called Couple's Birthing Intensive. It was just 1 night, for 2 1/2 hours and it entailed everything we needed to know about each other during childbirth.

This worked for us for various reasons. I work in a prenatal clinic, so I know the ins and outs about pregnancy: what happens to your body, what's actually happening inside with your baby, how your body transforms. I didn't need a whole day of that. Secondly, my husband read the The Expectant Father, which I believe he really liked, b/c it gave him a view of what pregnancy is like, month to month, written by a man. I felt confident that he was aware of the changes, and I know it made him feel good to understand what was happening. We wanted a course that was going to be real, to the point, but also a bonding experience, as parents.

Oh, and my husband was a little leery of the yoga piece, (he's extraordinarily inflexible) but I assured him that the entire class was not about that. Thank goodness, it wasn't... We did do some breathing exercises facing each other, a little downward dog, a little stretching, but nothing any other person couldn't do. So it wasn't bad at all.

One of my favorite parts of the class was when the instructor had us sit and face each other. She had us put one hand on our hearts and the other hand on the baby, had us close our eyes, and told us to take deep breaths. She had us think about US, about the baby in between us, about the three of us. I cried and cried and it was hard to breathe, but it was such a sincere moment. It was the right way to be in the moment, to see that we were doing this together, and that for the 1st time I felt like a family. It was pretty cool.

Along with this, the instructor had us write about our fears, our unknowns, but also what it was we were excited about. She had us journal a little, but wanted us to share this with each other at different time. She said we should go on a date before the baby came, and to sit down and talk about these things. I thought this was great as well.

After we did a little yoga, a little crying (mainly the women), a little journaling, she told us to take a break, and gave us beer and oreo cookies! How awesome is that! The guys surely loved it and some of us women loved the fact that she had non-alcoholic beer for us. What a way to keep it real.

Meanwhile, she set up the video, which was 2 excerpts of women giving birth. Now, as you can imagine, they were about women naturally giving birth at home. She did say that this wasn't the way we "had" to give birth, by any means, but she wanted to show us how natural childbirth can be, and her main focus was to show us that we didn't have to be afraid. She talked about how our society has shaped our fears around childbirth and that it was all wrong. Women give birth, all the time, everywhere in the world, and it isn't something we need to be afraid of. We are very lucky to have all the medication and all the interventions b/c sometimes they will save lives, but that doesn't mean it's necessary for everyone. We don't need to go into it thinking, OMG this is going to be so painful and how am I going to get this baby out, and how am I going to do this! All this doubt and fear is what gets people in trouble. Believe me, I'm still convincing myself of all of this as I approach my 38th week of pregnancy, but it does give me a sense of relief when I think about it this way. I just think, our bodies are made to do this and I am doing it for the baby, not for me.

The teacher then gave a run-down of what early and active labor was, and what to do during this time. Told us to stay at home as long as we could - that it was better to labor in the comfort of your own home than in the hospital. She talked about what to eat and when to rest and not just for the women giving birth, but for the partners as well. It was great b/c again, it was to the point, she gave us handouts, it wasn't daunting, and we left feeling very confident.

So yeah, we walked out of there and thought, we're ready - let's do this. And we are ready. We have a couple of weeks left and I think we have done everything we can to prepare, mentally, for the birth of our baby. Now it's just praying that he will be born around his due-date, that it isn't a 30 hr labor, and that he's born straight into the water, gently and smoothly.

33 weeks pregnant

These photos were taken 4 weeks ago! The belly isn't very attractive, but I have to say I'm proud of my "linea negra," which you can't see very well in this photo, but it's there. It's the dark line that goes from the pelvic bone to the top of the belly. What's cool is that it gets longer as the baby gets bigger. They say it really doesn't mean anything. It's just a pigmentation thing, and for some women it's dark and for some women it doesn't show up at all. It goes away after the baby is born. My belly button is looking and feeling weird these days. Hope that goes back to normal too.

My Blessing Way

A close friend of mine threw me a shower, that isn't quite your typical baby shower - it's more of a mama's shower. A Blessing Way shower, as it is called, is a shower that is more about embracing the fact that you're going to be a mother. It's a spiritual ritual that brings women together to celebrate birth and motherhood.

Here's a definition that you'll find out there that will fully describe what it actually is: The Mother's Blessing Ceremony, also known as The Blessingway or Blessing Way Ceremony originates from the Navajo people. It is a very positive ritual, affirming that a woman will have a natural and beautiful birth experience. The ceremony marks a woman's rite of passage. It is a ceremony of empowerment near the time of birthing. Within a circle of friends in a quiet, gentle, spiritual ceremony, those attending will celebrate sisterhood, welcome a new baby to earth and honor mother, birth life and rebirth.

This description was taken from www.birthbeads.com. It has more info on what a ceremony entails, if you're interested. We decided to do just a few of the "rituals" as we also wanted the shower to be unique to me and my friends, as I said before. I think this is important; you want to be comfortable and you also want your friends to be comfortable. I wanted a shower where we could eat good food, in a soothing environment, to have great conversations about becoming a mother. And that is exactly what it was.

This what we did. I have many dear friends, strong women in my life, that I would have loved to have been there, but this type of shower needs to be intimate. I decided to just have friends that have recently become mothers. Having a group of women that have this in common, was the only way I could justify not having others attend. But this is just what I did, it could be different for others.

The lovely host, my dear friend, decided to have everyone bring a dish a to share. It could have been one that either reminded them of their own mothers, of me, or just one they enjoyed making. We had such a wonderful variety, and they were all delicious. Then we asked that each person bring two red beads. These beads could have some sort of meaning or simply be sweet, red, beads. Each mother threaded their own beads that was then turned into a birthing necklace. This is something I will wear when I go into labor and deliver the baby. To me, the symbolism is being in solidarity with not only these mothers in the room who had given birth, but to all mothers in the world. After this, each friend gave me a piece of advice, an offering that was meant to empower me through this journey of motherhood. These offerings were all unique, thoughtful, and extremely inspiring. A few were powerful readings, one included awesome music, one - an endearing video, and one in a button that said it all - STRENGTH.

Along with this, each mom brought something to throw into a "nurture basket." This was a wonderful basket full of good teas, lotions, lip balm, bath salts, etc. Something I will for sure use now, and after the baby comes.

In between these "rituals" we talked about birthing stories, about how a baby changes relationships, about how a baby brings so many challenges, but so much joy. We cried, we laughed, and I believe we truly enjoyed an honest and genuine moment of what motherhood is all about.

So with this, I have to recommend that A Mother's Blessing is the way to go. You can design it to your liking, and the main focus should be about genuinely embracing birth and motherhood. Talking about what that means to you, and to others. The shower should have nothing to with gifts for the baby. It's about empowering you, and about receiving inspiration from loved ones. Right before becoming a mother, everything is so mysterious, so unknown. Why not prepare in a way that will give you confidence, that will ease your fears, and prepare you in a way that will let you know - You Can Do This.

34.5 weeks pregnant

This is around the time I believe pregnant women start to feel quite anxious. There is so much to do before the baby comes!

For instance, everyday, there is something we should be checking off the list:

» childbirth ed classes
» tour of maternity unit at the hospital
» plane tickets for mom and abuelita
» wash baby clothes
» attend baby showers
» make sure ipod has all the right songs for birth
» finish reading books
» prepare hospital bag
» write up birth plan
» have hospital paperwork ready
» choose a dr. for the baby
» get enough sleep!

I'm sure there's more that I can't think of right now... I feel like everyday I'm making some sort of decision. It can be overwhelming at times and then it's super exciting too!

I'm feeling all sorts of new things too, physically. Supposedly the baby grows very quickly during that last trimester, and he is for sure. Sleeping and just laying around has gotten difficult. I really have to think about which way to move whether I am in bed or watching television. My hips hurt from sleeping on my sides all the time! I don't think that's going to get any better. Now I'm really craving oranges. I have to have about 2 a day. They are so delicious to me. Luckily I haven't gotten swollen. I've been swimming a lot, which I love to do the most these days and apparently that helps with circulation. I feel lighter every time. I have emotional highs and lows, which I believe are normal. I hope they are...

I'm starting to have really weird dreams again. I had them in the 1st trimester, very vivid and impressionable. Before, my dreams consisted of being with my family, in foreign countries, and always feeling like I had to protect them. Strange. One I will never forget, we were on the coast of Mexico and we were told that the Somali Pirates were approaching the shore. I had to make sure my family was in a safe place. I laughed about that one when I woke up. Last night's dream was about my elementary school classmates. We were all in school, but we were all adults. Taking tests, going to gym class, hanging out. It was great, and also kind of funny. I think it's so interesting how our dreams have some sort of correlation to our current life. 1st trimester dreams = fear. 3rd trimester dreams = childhood. 2nd trimester dreams weren't memorable, at all. Couldn't tell you what I dreamed about and probably means I wasn't thinking very much.

Life is as exciting as it can get right now. A lot is happening in our little world, and I know, this is nothin'! I do try to stay focused on what's going on "outside." I watched the Olympics, I've been reading non-pregnancy books, I'm waiting to see what's going to happen with our nation's healthcare reform, I'm following the aftermaths of the recent, massive earthquakes in Haiti and Chile. So much to take in these days, but it all seems to feel just right.

Bringing Baby into the World

Earlier in my pregnancy I heard that in your 1st trimester there's a lot of introspection going on. You do a lot of inward thinking, like, holy crap I'm pregnant and what does that mean? How is going to feel, what should I expect? You're so excited yet super apprehensive. Then in your second trimester it's all about what you are physically feeling and how you look. The body expands, people start noticing, you talk a lot about the pregnancy and what is going. In this 3rd trimester you start to think, ok, I'm going to have this baby soon and all of sudden The Thinking begins. What does that mean for me? For my husband? How IS IT going to change our lives, and what are we going show him, and teach him, and how are we going to make sure that he learns to love, that he learns compassion, and that sometimes he will not know the mysteries of life?

I believe my thinking has a lot to with my work. I see pregnant women all the time and I often see women question their pregnancies. I work in an environment where many women aren't very excited about being pregnant. They learn to deal with it, but it's not something they're thrilled about. They get angry because they realize that having a child is difficult, and that it's going to entirely change their lives. But what I don't see them doing is prepare in a way that will make their childrens' lives better than their own, or prepare for healthier lives, and I don't see them doing it with some purpose.

Luckily, I don't have these thoughts and I am by no means angry about having a child, but it has brought me to think about why it is that I'm bringing this baby into this world. I can't possibly be doing it because I simply want to! I am not "planning" what kind of life I want our children to have, but it has become important to me to think about what is the purpose of life, and how am I going to share and explore that with our baby, once he's a kid, teenager, then an adult? I know, this is a bit philosophical, but it's been consuming my thoughts lately.

So, this is what I'm pondering. I haven't really come up with any solid answers (and I don't think I will), but right now this is what's lingering in my brain. I know that my husband and I lead healthy lifestyles that will greatly influence our child's life, and that is reassuring. I see that. My purpose in life is to be happy, to love, to have compassion, and to lead a life that is fulfilling. With this, Baby Jimenez-Smith will have a good start.

Pregnancy - Love or Hate

People have been asking me lately if I like being pregnant overall. I think this is such an interesting question and it's one that I never think to ask others who are. I have to say that the whole experience is fascinating, and I love embracing it, but I have to admit that there are times where I don't like being pregnant.

Here, I have a list:
Hormonal ups and downs.
Missing my pre-pregnancy body.
Feeling super-full after eating, and like I'm going to explode.
Sex is difficult.
People thinking you're "disabled."
The achy hips when I wake up b/c it's not comfortable sleeping on my belly or back.
The itchy boobs and belly.
The fact that I stopped running at 4 months, and now can't run. Can't wait to run!(this is my own fault, but now I know.)

I know, I sound miserable - I'm not. Here's a list of why I love it:

I've been pressing a hard spot on my belly, which I think is the baby's bottom and his whole body moves. I can't help but giggle.
I love it that the extra progesterone my body produces keeps me dazed.
It's fun when people want to touch my belly.
Yoga feels even more amazing.
It's nice when people look at you and smile.
The time does go by quickly.
Imagining who or what the baby will like.
Craving foods that are good for you, like oranges.
Totally enjoying food I shouldn't be eating.

This is what I'm feeling right now - all of these things. It's all because of this little love child my husband and I have created. Totally worth it.

30 weeks pregnant

Ah, time is ticking away and it's getting to the point where I'm not sure how I feel about all of this. It's positive, but it's everything. I'm starting to get nervous about labor and delivery and I can't get enough of people's birth stories. I know I'm strong and I know I can do it, but I'm still scared. I need to let go of that fear though. I've read that it will keep you from having a smooth delivery and if you go in with fear, you'll create resistance, which in turn more PAIN! The crazy part too is trying to imagine what that pain is like - I have nothing to compare it to. And then I have people tell me, having the baby is a piece of cake, just wait until after the baby is home.

I'm a feeling a lot of physical changes. My belly and boobs are itchy. I do put on some Burt's Bees body balm that feels great. I have all kinds of crazy blue and green veins running through my body. I kind of look like a map. The baby is kicking and moving as if he's trying to get out. It hurts! But it's amazing. I sometimes wonder about my tolerance of pain when I do feel the aggressive movements. But seriously, it hurts and sometimes I brace for the next kick or punch and hope that it isn't as hard. I also feel this weird umbilical cord sensation from the inside. I read somewhere that the baby uses it like a toy. So yeah, he's definitely yanking on it or something, which isn't so pleasant...

I am being a wuss though and have to say that with the discomfort comes the joy. I look down and think, holy shit, I'm having a baby. I think about what he's going to look like, about what kind of personality he's going to have, whether he's going to be a difficult baby or an easy baby. There are no opinions or judgements on these thoughts, I just wonder and get all excited.

I haven't been able to really nest since the house is on the market. It doesn't bother me though. I love having a de-cluttered, clean, house and have learned that this is how I want to continue living, whether in a new house or not. In a few weeks, I'm going to pull out the basics for what I will need when the baby is born and that's it. I'm sure that will do for a month or two. I'd like to bring my baby into a simple, de-cluttered world!

My nesting has consisted of what we are going to experience with the baby and what I'd like our lives to look like. I'm very adamant about living in a different country (preferably in Latin-America) just for a couple of years. We need to expose our child (or children and ourselves) to another culture once and a while. My husband and I know the beauty and benefits of that, and it would be a shame to not do that with our children. I couldn't wait to tell my husband about my plan, but when he returned from Guatemala recently he wasn't feeling well, physically, and well I thought it might not be a good time... I did mention it though so I know we'll have the conversation later.

I'm now planning baby showers with friends and family. That's another thing I'd like to be cognizant of. We have most of the "stuff" we need for the baby, given by family and friends, so we're needing to be a bit creative about gifts and such. My husband and I have always agreed that we should live with the minimum, that we shouldn't waste, that we should recycle everything and anything that we can. This baby will not be deprived in any way, shape, or form and we're just hopeful that our children will adapt and enjoy these basic standards of living.

I have more photos to post, so stay tuned.